Burnout is an increasingly common and very distressing stressful situation.
If you are suffer from burning out, the good news is that it is particularly common in people who are intelligent, sensitive and undertake very caring or nurturing work!
Burn-out can also be reflection of leading too narrow a life - not balancing reponsibilites and work with leisure, nurturing relationships, play & relaxation
...OR it can be a sign that it is time for new skills and/or a new direction to come into our life!
Symptoms of "spiralling down", "burnout" or "chronic fatigue syndrome" vary from person to person, and from day to day, key features are:
Disconnection:
- Disconnection from our power - where has it gone?
- Disconnection from the things we would so like to be doing
- Disconnection from those around us - who have lots of energy and choice
- Disconnection from our life-force - our vital spark has gone!
- Disconnection from fulfilling our dreams - and the joy that goes with that
Suffering:
- Frustration
- Repeated failure
- Helplessness
- Depending on others and feeling 'let down'
- Powerlessness, Lack of resources & support
- Inner emptiness
- Vicious cycles dragging us down
- Fear about the future
'Dumped on':
- Failure to maintain healthy personal boundaries
- trying too hard to be good, acceptable, "spiritual" or "please others"
- Compulsive 'emotional sponge' for the problems, burdens or bad feelings of others
Our human DNA encodes natural "protect and survive" mechanisms - our anger and aggression - for protecting our personal space (energy field, health and wellbeing), but sometimes we lack the confidence and/or skill to use these natural gifts appropriately and proportionately.
Check out our page on "ANGER & FRUSTRATION - MANAGEMENT & RELEASE" for more information]As our self-confidence, self-esteem and productivity falls, a vicious cycle is established wherein we are increasingly vulnerable to taking on more burdens and wasting more energy in vain efforts to please, to be in control, or to be "good enough".
At the same time it takes more and more of our energy to "hold down" ("bottle-up") our escalating frustration and bad feelings towards ourself and others.
Periodic uncontrolled, self-sabotaging outbursts to release the pressure of these held-in bad feelings, just serves to tighten our grip on them - draining yet more of our precious life-energyDriven-ness, Obsession, Addictions, Over-Control or Over-attachment:
- Driven-ness
- Energy Scattering
- Over-controlling ("control freak!" behaviour)
- Over-attachment to particular agendas or perceived solutions to problems can drain us of our energy
- Fear, Anxiety, constant worrying can become exhausting
- Obsessive search for 'answers' to our problems
...can become a hiding-place from stress, or a perceived route of escape that fails to work and actually keeps us still trapped. While we are "hiding" or obsessed with "escaping" from stress we may not be directly confronting and dealing it, so they just go on and on, or even get worse until we "wise up" and find out how to regain our balanceA Poem about Burn-out:
Life's vital sweet energy all out of me bled
Dead weary
Dead tired
Dead exhausted...
just Dead!
So much to do, but I can't move a muscle
Completely worn out after desperate tussle
Spiralling down, I fought like a cat...
'til eventually collapsed like a soggy drowned rat
Life's now slipped away - I have no control...
left to flounder in one hell of a hole!
The pressure's still there, demands still arrive
but I just can't respond - I'm barely alive
Can only rest, defeated and glum.
I sure did my best, but now need my Mum
Vulnerable, weak - what will become?
Nowhere to hide, nowhere to run
Completely 'all-in'- no more can I fight
Tired and haggard - a miserable sight
I only can rest, but what of tomorrow?
Repeat this foul pattern? Re-visit sorrow?
Will impatience and fear drive to weariness again?
Is this all that life offers to ambitious men?
Break out of this cycle? - Surely I must?
Overwork then exhaustion has got to be bust!
Perhaps if I focus a little bit more...
on what is essential, and do nothing more...
Give some burdens to others that weren't really mine.
Let go some control - so I can feel fine.
Learn to say "No" - they say it's a skill!
Delegate responsibilities and tasks with a will
Do I need so many achievements to get up life's hill?
Can only money and ownership ever give me a thrill?
Can I manage with less - to appreciate more?
The beauty of nature? Friends at the door?
A balanced life does not have to be dull
Could go at things 'steady' - not charge like a bull!
But what of impatience? And what about fear?
And how would I cope with less wine and less beer?
Meditation exercise, yoga, friends...
calming and energising these weird "New Age" trends!
But first there's the grieving for what I have lost...
and the healing of driven-ness conditioning's wounds..© Michael J. Meredith 2000 As the old saying goes "When you are in a hole - stop digging!"
Why not come along instead to our gentle & fun Holistic Lifestyle Events or Confidential 1-to-1 coaching sessions and experience the 10 Ways to Rekindle Your Spark?
Worried about whether you will have enough energy for a workshop or private session?... Leave that problem to us...
Our task is to re-connect you to your energy - If we fail we will give you your money back!
Author, Healer & Stress Management Coach : Dr. Mike Meredith
More Help for Burnout & Chronic Fatigue Syndrome ME CFS
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