1. Positive Self-Affirming Music CD
Remembering who and what we are is a key part of surviving derogatory remarks (also to survive and overcome arguments, bullying, fighting, insulting or offensive behaviour and body language) from others. A good self-affirmation can also help us to let go of old patterns of bullying or otherwise down-grading ourself.
The "Songs for the Inner Child" album CD by Shaina Noll is a good example of how we can treat and support ourselves much better, and this is learning and growth opportunities that sometimes comes from being on the receiving end of abuse, quarrelling, abusive argumentive behaviour or arrogance or neglect.
"How Could Anyone?" is a particularly special affirmation song on this CD (Amazon links + live clips: UK Canada USA)
How could anyone ever tell you, you are anything less than beautiful?
How could anyone ever tell you, you are less than whole?
How could anyone fail to notice, that your loving is a miracle?
How deeply you're connected to my soul
2. Abusive or "Toxic" Relationships: Overview
3. Conflict Management Workbook & Course Manual: Buy now!
(New UK 2005 edition includes section on Domestic Violence)
4. Books
"Life and How to Survive It" by Robin Skynner & John Cleese (Details & Order pages)
"Families and How to Survive Them" by Robin Skynner & John Cleese (Details & Order pages)
"Beyond the Power Struggle" by Susan M. Campbell (Details & Order pages)
"Friends and Enemies" by Dorothy Rowe (Details & Order pages)
"Beyond Fear" by Dorothy Rowe (Details & Order pages)
"Verbal Judo" by George J. Thompson & Jerry B. Jenkins 2004 edition: UK & Europe Canada USA
"Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway" by Susan Jeffers:
E-book digital download version: Amazon UK link (Worldwide Supplier)
Audio CD: UK & Europe Canada edition USA & International
Paperback: UK & Europe Canada USA & International
"To Walk on Water - Get Out of the Boat" by John Ortberg (Details & Order pages)
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5. Video & DVD
Film: "The Last Samurai"
Dramatises the martial arts principle of "No Mind" i.e. not being over-attached to the outcome of an argument, fight or other dispute or to what others are thinking or making judgements about.
Instead we can focus on doing our best and making the most of the situation we are in.
Availability on DVD or Video for: UK & Europe Canada USA
6. Film: "Pleasantville"
Humorous film with a very serious message for anyone who dreams of living in a community where there is no conflict or violence and everyone is very nice to everyone else all the time! (More information)
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6. Webpages
"Reflective Practice" - a tool for personal development and stress prevention in the workplace
"Deal with Hate, Hating, Hatred - how to cope"
"Strategies for coping with chronic Stress"
"Self-Defence - personal security self discipline"
"Bullying - Harassment - Victimisation in School or Workplace"
Domestic Violence - Resources |
Managing Anger and Developing Conflict Management Skills New & Popular Research Resources (constantly updated Read & View list opens in new window) UK & Europe Canada USA (all deliver world-wide) |
Conflict Management Training: Article + UK Conflict Management Workshop
Aggression, Hostility & Confrontation - De-sensitisation*: Karate & Martial Arts
* Fear or Depression Paralysis
Many of us are very sensitive to people or situations that are hostile, aggressive or abusive. If we "freeze up" with anxiety or fear we will find it hard to think clearly or act decisively. We may even go into denial about what is happening and either pretend everything if fine, or "split off" (dissociate) into unreal thoughts, perceptions or (displacement of anxiety) activities - pretending that nothing bad is happening by shutting the abuse or aggression out of our awareness.Martial arts or self-defence training (U.S. English spelling = "self-defense"), IF REASONABLY REALISTIC, can help us to de-sensitize ourselves to the point where we are able to fully confrontthe reality of a threatening situation or person, skilfully consider our range of options (fight, flight, ignore, negotiate) and have a low enough anxiety level to respond effectively.
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